Cubbie's First Post

Yesterday, I announced to my Facebook readers that I would be pulling the plug on my account there. It was not due to some special anniversary or for any specific reason. I realized on Sunday night as I was in the midst of a serious melt-down how using FB was not helping me feel any better.

My name is Doug. Almost 18 months ago, my partner Phil died. The sleep apnea, left untreated for years, claimed his life. Some people will argue and insist that it is not possible, but this blog is my blog and they can go do inappropriate things with their furniture. I know what happened to my beloved Bear. I am the one who found him dead on our living room floor that Saturday morning in December, face down and arms crossed akimbo under his chest. I can remember this horrible day with a kind of clarity missing from most of my other days. 

I have written countless words about Phil. The eulogizing never stops. I loved him and still do. He was the best and brightest part of my life. We were truly happy together. Together we were Team Ursine and nothing was better than being that. He was my ohana. He was my best friend and most frequent companion. Life after has been Hell.